1. There must always be a reliance on the truth. Even if you know that now it would be appropriate to say words of support, but you do not feel the impulse, this will not give the proper result and will only strengthen the client in neurosis. Speak honestly, without masks, about yourself and your feelings. At some point you are an example for your client, so you should not produce lies.
2. I’m not in the entertaining position. Even if a person pays for sessions, this is primarily his need to understand himself. If the client is waiting for initiative and entertainment, this is an infantile position to shift responsibility.
3. Must be a request for the session. If not, then dedicate time to finding it, otherwise the unconscious will be thrown in all directions and I, as a psychologist, will not have a guide, not to mention the structure of the client himself.
4. It is very important to avoid from personal projections, to monitor and clear them surgically . I can build 1000 great hypotheses and none of them will be about the client. Nobody canceled personal neuroses. A high level of acceptance and knowledge of one’s own Shadow is needed to minimize error.
5. Emotional and physical contact has a huge impact. The dry analysis has outlived itself long ago. Lively, attentive communication is better than any theory.
6. Not you are the main director of the process, but a healthy part of client’s psyche, that strives for development. You create the space and you have the keys. Which doors, when to open and in what configuration the unconscious opens. Minimal intervention, yet subtle attention allows you to start the best healing process, the most harmonious, even if you are working with resistance. This approach is very free from pride and a sense of power over the reality of the client.
7. It is important to feel that you are holding space. Even if your client is a very authoritative person who has seen a lot of things in their life and is 2 times older than you, they came to a specialist whom they had already chosen for some reason. If you merge into self-doubt, it will only strengthen their parental position and control. You may not know something or feel confused, which you can talk about, but the interaction should remain from the mature part.
8. It is very important to believe and transmit faith in the progress of the client. They may doubt themself. Their psyche is most likely a dark forest for them, in which there is a lot of uncertainty. If you believe in its sanogenic potential, it gives the client the opportunity to maintain this connection.
9. I often ask my unconscious to help me in my work. When I feel stuck, complicated and my mind doesn’t save the situation, I turn to intuition. If you have a strong connection, most likely the result will surprise even yourself.
10. If you feel that at some point a dislike for a client awakens due to your personal biases, it is important to consciously move into a meta position. We all carry a certain set of overt and shadow traits, and some combination may not be personally close. However, it is very important to perceive a person as a whole in a working process. I always think that for all their life situation, they coped very well with adaptability. I admire the strength of the spirit inherent in a person.